1. You CAN use Oils and butters* and natural at home treatments.
As a matter of fact, you should incorporate some kind of oil or butter or emollient type product into your regimen. Relaxers strip the hair of its natural oils, and care must be taken to maintain balance.
Olive and coconut oils are good penetrating oils that help with moisture retention, and coconut oil* reduces protein loss in hair.
Avocado oil* is a good medium thick oil. It has Vitamin E* in it, which is excellent for the hair and scalp.
Grapeseed oil is lightweight and leaves a glossy finish. It also withstands heat well, so it is good to use before blow-drying or using heat. But please do not go heat crazy, because heat damage is the pits! This oil is also a good carrier oil, meaning that it mixes well with other oils, especially essential oils* that smell good, like lavender or lemon. Yum!
Jojoba oil is a natural fungicide.
Tea tree oil is great for dandruff, just part your hair and apply it to the scalp.
Shea butter is a rich, thick butter that is excellent for dry brittle hair.
Egg and Mayonnaise Hair Masks are good light protein treatments. For a bit more protein, go to your local health food store and pick up plain Greek Yogurt. Pick out the one with the most protein. Protein is essential for relaxed hair.
All of these oils can be used together to fit your individual needs. In my friends case, the jojoba, tea tree oil* and Shea butter* worked great for her.
2. You still have to know your hair.
Okay, this one sounds silly, but it’s true. Just because your hair is straightened, does not meant that it is like someones with naturally straight hair. I found that a few of my relaxed friends believed this, and they were perplexed at why some of the products they used did not work well. If your hair is thick and coarse, chances are that when straightened, you will still have a lot of hair to deal with. So you may not be able to use mousse to hold your hair. You may need gel instead.
Or perhaps your natural hair is fine, so when you relax it, it is somewhat limp. You will need use products that make your hair thicker. It really depends on how the hair on your head decides to act.
Also, just like some naturals think at first that no chemicals means less work, some of my relaxed friends felt that hair that is straightened every 6 to 8 weeks meant less maintenance. And then they were surprised at the breakage or lack of length.
Repeat after me: HEALTHY HAIR IS WELL MAINTAINED HAIR. See? The key word is maintenance. If you have hair goals, you have to do things to reach that goal. And that means work. You want length? Volume? Strength? Nothing worth having is easy, Beauties. Except for a glass of wine, but I digress.
Adina Sharpe says
I call BS on this article. This is written as if women with relaxed hair aren’t aware that their hair is beautiful. It’s making an assumption that women with relaxed hair are assuming that natural hair looks better and we need some consoling. BULL!
What woman doesn’t know that all she has to do is pay attention to her hair? That she needs a regimen? That it’s easier to comb through her hair when it’s relaxed? That too much product is not a good thing? That in order to maintain it they need a moisture protein balance? I guess it must be someone who doesn’t have access to the internet because almost every black woman knows this! I also don’t know too many black women who have to get a pep talk about how their hair is as good as natural hair. Most of us know that…..and the benefits of it when it’s taken care of. So please…..stop.
Kim Fancy says
I agree, the tone of the article was a bit condescending.
Andrea says
I am six years natural and I’m to the point that I don’t comment to relaxed women about their hair, my hair or hair in general. I don’t compliment their hair or make suggestions. Nothing. I don’t even discuss the topic with them. For one, reduces of the chance of offensive comments and questions about natural hair I don’t like. 2, a lot of people assume because I don’t relax my hair that I feel some kind of judgmental way about them wearing a relaxer. I dislike relaxers on MY HAIR!! So don’t talk, No drama. Works for me.
Cb Sampson says
Is beauty worth applying chemicals to your brain never sacrifice your health for so called beauty
Tsehai Lewis says
It is! No point in debating it, we are entitled to wear our hair the way we choose.
Courtney Gray says
Who said you couldnt
Tsehai Lewis says
An earlier post young lady
Ashley Ruiz says
Don’t say anything about health unless you are cutting out chemicals all around you. That means your lotion, toothpaste, food even. So I should cut out just those chemicals in a relaxer but you apply more chemicals daily than I do occasionally. I hate when people try to spread their propaganda.
Jamie Carter-Bailey says
Im totally with you. Especially parfums and deodorants!!!
Lamara Stone says
Deodorant has MANY bad chemicals. Some studies say may increase chance for breast cancer. I’m so tired of people judging and putting others down bc they don’t have the same opinion! This world would be so boring if we all were EXACTLY the same. Ok. I’m done. 🙂
Kamela M Oxner says
I wish people stop calling relaxers ‘perms’
Chevy Genous says
Those other chemicals do not burn your skin though.
Shāy Ponts says
^^^ but are carcinogens nonetheless
Ashley Ruiz says
And this is why I make my own deodorant!! And Shay Ponts…don’t even try to explain. People only care about what “appears” to be bad and jumping on the bandwagon without even educating themselves.
Shāy Ponts says
So true! What do you use to make your deodorant? I recently began using the aluminum-free deodorants which aren’t antiperspirants, but I do smell myself after a while. Tmi and all that, I know, but do you continually reapply throughout the day or is merely one application sufficient for you?
Ashley Ruiz says
I make my deodorant with: 3tbs extra virgin coconut oil, 3tbs arrowroot powder or corn starch, 2tbs Shea butter or cocoa butter, and 1tbs baking soda. The recipe actually calls for 3tbs baking soda and 2tbs arrowroot powder but I had a sensitivity to that level of baking soda so I reduced it. Its not an antiperspirant but I dont stink at all. A friend of mine gets really stinky so she uses the original amount of baking soda and it’s the only thing that prevents her smelling. She hasn’t had any sensitivities.
Tsebo Kobbina says
Yes they are beautiful in fact they strong hair hence it can’t withstand being processed and still look good
Alicia Jones Gibbs says
No fried scalp here
Asha Jamia says
Lol hear we go, this is like when “Dark girls” came out to make darker women know their beauty, then movie “light girls” came out. No one is saying you’re not beautiful, but just letting the women treated like the underdogs (remind you I said TREATED LIKE) know their just as beautiful in their natural texture. I guess we been getting to much attention and spotlight for y’all though.
Chevy Genous says
Right!!
DeAndra Wright says
Lol what a sad comment “getting too much.attention”.seriously? We are all black women, relaxed or not. Who cares what is on too of your head? Ppl put too much emphasis/importance on hair!!!!
Asha Jamia says
Please tell where I said we weren’t all black women boo? I’m saying if people are saying “yay go natural hair” and is all for natural hair, women with relax hair get all upset and be like “we’re just as beautiful”. Which is true, no one is saying otherwise. But with years of spotlight being on the relaxed beauties, natural beauties get some attention, then people get upset, like for why? We can’t share the shine. Obviously you’re a little mad boo.
Stacey Lawrence says
The majority of black women have been perming or dare I say Jherri Curling our hair for years now all of a sudden some decide to “go” natural which means you weren’t ALWAYS natural and now you want to be judge mental? I decided to go natural because sadly it never occurred to me that that was an option since my hair has been permed since I was 7. I thought that it was sad that I am almost 40 and had no clue how my natural hair looked or what to do with it but I don’t look down on somebody that doesn’t want to make that choice nor will I ever. With all of things that already divide our community do we really want to start a stupid hair battle?
Nicky Moody says
So very true
Jamie Carter-Bailey says
Smh why can’t we just acknowledge that all women are beautiful. Everyone has their own preferences, it doesnt make one person better than the next. Why is it so hard for us to get along, agree to disagree? ! #bemore #riseabove #reachhigher
Latasha Lacking says
I got a relaxer after being natural almost 3 years and I have no regrets and no “fried scalp”.
Leo B Venzen says
Who said they weren’t?
Lamara Stone says
Do to your hair what makes you happy and feel the best you can about yourself. Natural, relaxed, long weave, short chop, pink mohawk, whatever! It’s your life. Live it!
Constance Bates-Coleman says
Again beauty is on the inside and we enhance it however that makes us feel good on the outside dont ever let your hair dictate who you are regardless of your choice of style method
Charlene Cha LaBranche says
This debate again
Kamela M Oxner says
Thanks. I’m of people attemppting make me feel guilty about having relaxed hair. It does not me less ‘black’.
Real Shock says
I relax my hair so it can relax!
Even plants get a little something to nurture it!
I didn’t do childbirth naturally either!
F**k that give me something to make it better!
Real Shock says
I never uhh heard of one person dieing or getting cancer from a perm
Niqueria Martin says
I let my hair return back to its natural state three years ago. And I have no regrets! 😉
Trina Smith says
I’m so sick of this topic. I hate when people feel that a decision they have made for themselves is the only way to go for the rest of the world.
Natalie Lexture says
Yes they are too….all are beauty no matter what
Betty L. Coley says
Yes for sure
Tabitha Dynasty B says
What do they mean “are beauties too” as if ppl ever said they weren’t? Let’s be honest relaxed hair has been the standard for beauty for a very long time. I think the natural movement is a much needed beautiful thing! Not just for health reasons (as I see a lot of comments stating there are chemicals in many of the products we use) but because its important for young girls to know that their natural beauty and natural tresses are enough. If they see black women proudly displaying their natural kinks, curls and coils then they’d want to do it as well.
Kisha Masters says
I wouldn’t dare burn away the versatility of my hair, I can wear a fro Tmmrw and a silky press the next day. Glad I made my choice of going natural after not having a choice for 14+ years. I never knew how beautiful and healthy and shiny my natural hair is. Yasss yal missing out lol
Linda Cushman says
All ladies are beautiful! We all have special assets that we can use to enhance our beauty in various ways! Never Forget We Are
C Angel Handley says
If it wasn’t beautiful folks wouldn’t be doing it. Natural hair is getting praise for embracing the struggle that relaxers can escape to some degree. There is no hard fast general rule but I don’t want to see people pulling this “We are all the same, we all suffer the same” no.
Yes your relaxed hair is beautiful but naturals tend to pay a societal price that you don’t to embrace the “nappy blackness” our society taught us was ugly centuries back, and that deserves recognition and praise.
We know you are beautiful already being rekaxed, that’s why society says we should look like you? Feeling left out because someone else is being praised when you are already the status quo?