Curly Hair Etiquette – Acceptable And Unacceptable Things To Say To Natural Girls

Acceptable and unacceptale things to say to natural girls

Curly Girl Etiquette refers to way other people treat our hair on a daily basis. By treat I mean, comment, touch, not touch, opinions, and all other things that people think is there natural right to express about our hair.

It doesn’t matter what your hair type is, we all share some commonalities when it comes to natural curly hair. Our hair shrinks when we wet it and drys in a shrunken state, our hair grows upwards and outwards rather than straight down, our hair tangles easily and can get frizzy if we do not use the right products or tools and finally we spend a lot of time caring for and protecting it.

With that said, there is a certain level of pride we all have when it comes to our natural hair, and there is some expectation that when other people reference it or make inferences about it, they will remain within some imaginary boundaries that many of us consider reasonable.

In the below video the girls joke, but are kinda serious about how they feel their hair should be treated, and quite frankly we agree with some of the points and thought it would be fun to create our own list of curly girl etiquette do’s and don’ts, (mostly don’ts) with your help of course.

Here goes…

1. Do not just compliment me when my hair is straight – Don’t you feel ‘some type of way’ when you wear your hair curly all week straighten it for the weekend and on suddenly everyone starts talking about how great your hair looks and how hot you look! Curly hair is hot too you know!


2. Do not touch my hair if I do not specifically invite you to touch it – Claw hands are a definite no no. First off I don’t know where your hands have been and secondly there is no way those five fingers are running through these tight 4A curls, no ma’am!

3. Do not call me names – Power puff girl, Shaka Khan (in a bad way) you know that sort of thing. To be honest it really depends on the tone that goes along with the comment. If you have a weird look on your face and you are like “Eww you sure look like Shaka Khan today” then that’s not cool. But if you say “Wow you look amazing you remind me of Shaka Khan” then that is acceptable.

4. Yes, when I am walking out of the door with you, my hair is done – Do not ask me if I need to comb my hair when I am clearly dressed, and walking out of the door.

5. Do not tell me to comb my hair or suggest any other tools I can use – Who really puts a comb through some clumped up curls? Your hair does not have to be fully brushed out and every strand separated for your hair to be detangled. Clumped curls are what detangled curly hair looks like!

6. Do support me in the way I choose to handle my hair and do not force your own practices on me. – Nuff said.

That’s it! Lets come up with a few more, watch the video and comment below!

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About Petra


Hi I'm Petra Lomax , a staff writer and editor for BlackHairInformation.com . I am Jamaican born and raised and moved to the United States in my early 20's. I have a BA in Political Science and International relations as well as an MBA and a Masters In Project Management. I love travel, culture and anything that has to do with creative media and business.

About Petra


Hi I'm Petra Lomax , a staff writer and editor for BlackHairInformation.com . I am Jamaican born and raised and moved to the United States in my early 20's. I have a BA in Political Science and International relations as well as an MBA and a Masters In Project Management. I love travel, culture and anything that has to do with creative media and business.

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Lisa Lynn Evergin

Lord, please help me with this transition,,it is drivinf me insane..

The African Women With Natural Hair - Ghana And Nigeria

Lisa Lynn Evergin its not easy but you can find inspirations and encouragments to help you through your journey by visiting pages like this blackhair information.com andd liking other natural hair pages on facebook. We are also natural hair page so you can like us too, we share inspirationals to help people like you and other natural women. You can also find inspirations from watching natural hair videos on you tube and attending natural hair meetups where you get to discuss about your hair with other natural women like yourself. You learn tips and etc. I wish you goodluck and patience as you go through your journey. Your hair is beautiful as you are and you rock!

Arry Marie

Yes! I absolutely cannot stand when someone touches my hair – it’s invasion of my personal space. Only touch if I say you can touch, and please don’t pull on it… (It’s hard to shape my fro, lol)

Roxanne Holmes

the number one thing to me is to keep your opinions to yourself. we(naturals) don’t style our hair for other people. so therefore kick rocks if its not to your liking.

mojomo86
mojomo86

I agree 100%

Ness
Ness

how do find natural girls meetups?

Tara Anderson Taylor

So many people need to learn this. A coworker scrunched my hair in her hands and asked me “what are you planning on doing with this”!

Dj
Dj

Ok well similarly I would suggest the politeness of not accusing those who chose a chemically straightened look of trying to be white, nothing pisses them off more. I got a ridiculous amount of rude commentary for getting my hair relaxed, some from people who didn’t even have 100% naturally curly hair themselves or who had a relaxer at some point in their life. It has nothing to do with white or black not everyone wants to sit up until 4 in the morning fighting with their hair, so it goes both ways.

Tynika Nelson

yes Lisa, Im only 9 months in and Im dying.. Mainly b/c I don’t know what to do for moisture, but I refuse to go back. I miss my natural hair.. It’s been 20+ yrs of perms, but my hair was fuller & longer natural… Good luck girl

Takara

I love this. Some really good points. I can totally relate to the not putting the comb through clumped up coils.