When I started transitioning, I had a few close friends from work who couldn’t understand why I would want to go without relaxers.
They just couldn’t understand why I would ‘prefer to be nappy.” First of all, my hair isn’t even nappy! That was the first thought that crossed my mind. And, even if my hair was nappy, so what! It would be my hair, and apparently I was cool with it. Going natural for me was much more than just simply being tired of relaxers.
Granted, I was tired of paying the exuberant prices over 6 weeks for a touch up, but that wasn’t the sole reason. I simply wanted to see my natural curl pattern, and I wanted to embrace it.
Nappy or not, it was mine. However, my work friends were not trying to hear any of my reasons, they were simply trying to shove their opinions onto me.
I think you need to anticipate this as a natural and be careful around people like that. It happens all to often. I am in no way against relaxers. If that’s what you want to do to your hair, then go for it!
However, some people don’t feel the same way about naturals choosing to be natural. I will admit that in the past I have jokingly made comments to people trying to entice them to come to the natural side, but it was all in fun.
I know that some people truly don’t want to spend the extended time on wash day detangling and that’s perfectly fine! I think the most important thing, whether you’re a natural or non-natural, is that your hair is healthy.
So, if any of you are reading this and you’ve made comments to a natural, or a non-natural about their choices, just keep in mind that it isn’t a good feeling when others criticize what you do to your hair.
Evelyn Lattimore says
Thats just part of the negative mental conditioning of society that they have been seduced into. We have hair just like our Messsiah. Strong , kinky , curly , like lambs wool. Everything about us is unique , we are a peculiar people , designed different from every other nation , so we can be set apart , from the inside out. These women rather go around with other peoples hair as a lifestyle , or burn the hell out of their scalp , trying to fit into a wicked society that cares nothing about them not reconizing the beauty they carry , starting with our hair , which is our crown and glory. Go ahead be you , wear your natural hair proudly , and show the world what your Father gave you
Reava Bennett says
What a beautiful message. Thank you for your encouraging words. I go through the same thing but I just keep truckin’ through the hate and watch as my glorious crown grows bigger and stronger every single day.
I know you mean well, but you don’t lift yourself up by tearing others down. Your good points are negated by your judgmental criticisms. Knock that chip off your shoulder.
I have not always been natural, but I have for years agreed with the statement about the “negative mental conditioning of society that they have been seduced into,” and the whole paragraph that Ms. Lattimore wrote. There are some women who would rather go around with other peoples hair as a lifestyle or suffer through burned scalps rather than embracing their own hair. I see them every day. I once heard someone say that other races can be themselves better than we can be them (hair and all), and we can be ourselves better than they can be us (hair and all).
I hate when people tell me they prefer my hair straight. Its MY HAIR . I prefer to wear it in a curly afro and I have every right to do so .. I will never get my hair flat ironed again and rather you like it or not. I love my natural hair !