I am not sure when it began, or even if I am completely over it, but I had a period during my pregnancy and after the birth of my son where I went through what I called hair depression. I do not know if there is a textbook definition for this but I can definitely describe it to you.
I didn’t mind co washing my hair but, to
hell heck with deep conditioning. I didn’t want to see a steamer much less sit under one, no styling just messy buns and finger detangling but not with any sort of energy or focus. I did not purchase any new products or try anything new and I yanked out my single strand knots. All in all I was completely over my hair.
Hair depression is pretty much that point in your hair journey when you don’t feel like doing a daggone thing to your hair and you just don’t care any more.
I was at that point right before total neglect and I knew I had to get it together. Hair was my business, I wrote about it, I read blogs about it, I listened to other women as they expressed excitement over big chops and had a ton of questions about how to care for their hair.
I could answer the questions, because despite my ‘situation’ I still considered myself pretty seasoned in this natural hair thing, I have come a long way from 2009, 5 years and counting but that doesn’t mean I do not get frustrated with my own hair from time to time. The question is how do you get out of the funk?
It is easy to say, snap out of it before you go bald! Go deep condition your hair and stop being lazy! But sometimes when you are going through this period it is better to just put your hair away in a safe place and just walk away. By safe we mean, a protective style, like braids, twists with or without added hair, or if you are like me, just bun it and forget it.
Now you can’t walk away forever but the hope is, you will miss your hair so much it will force you to do something about how you are treating it.
Maybe its not about hair
You will be surprised how stress can affect other areas of your life and the fact that you mind will tell you ‘no no, that’s the problem, its your hair” but the truth is, it may be deeper. Some of you might say, hair depression is not a thing, it can never be that serious; and you know what you are right, it might not be the hair at all.
For me it was my added responsibility, now I had this new little life that I was so in love with, will I be the best for him? What will his life be like? I was worried about everything surrounding my son and ignoring everything about me.
Eventually I had to realize that if I did not take care of me, how in the world could I take care of him? So examine your mind completely, get in touch with your feelings and really try to separate what was causing your depression, maybe you did not have to neglect your hair in the first place.