Hearing stories like this from other women on a hair journey, my first thought is: people really have some nerve. I mean you would hope these stories are just myths, but no ma’m they really do happen.
When I had such an experience, I was not entirely sure what just happened. Did she really? Did she actually just touch my hair? She did, it happened, and I am still a little confused as I write this article.
Rocking a new style & my experience
I must admit I am pretty boring when it comes to my protective styles or just styles in general at work. I usually wear the same weave style everyday and switch it up twice a year with a nice flat iron* of my own hair. However, even though my usual works, I wanted to shake things up a bit. My new style of choice was set to be Senegalese twists. I have not had this style before, so you could imagine my excitement when I made the appointment.
As I set off to my meeting the next evening, I figured it would be business as usual. To my surprise, I could not have been any more wrong. As I walked through the door, people said they didn’t recognize me (maybe I should change my style more often then, huh?) With a new hair style comes many opinions. Luckily it worked out in my favor and they were all positive reviews.
The other side to those positive reviews comes from my curious white friends trying to figure out how they did it. “Oh my God, I want to go to an island now”, one of the girls said.
An island huh? Which one?Jamaica maybe? Must they have this hairstyle for you to want to take a vacation? I only kidd! As those thoughts ran through my head I hear her say, “Can I touch it, I wanna touch it?” The room filled with laughter. I perhaps laughed the most and turned the other way. “I’m gonna touch it anyway!” *insert Jaws theme music here*.
It was as if the time started to move in slow motion. She got up from her chair, and walked in my direction. She can’t be serious? But oh yes, she was. She was going to do this! I tried to brace myself for impact! I suddenly forgot all the self defense moves I learned from watching my shows (Yes, Netflix can be educational).
I froze up! As she reached for my hair, I thought to myself, “Do I want to go to jail today?” Before, I could come up with an answer to that question her hand was in my hair.
Was I being petted? I had to take a deep breath and count backwards from ten. Now, I understand and appreciate the admiration of my hair and everything, but let me tell you that there are rules to this game boo.
I am the only black person in the office where I work. I have add braids, wore a short wig. I finally went natural. They are always fascinated about my hair. They wear the same style for years or all there lives. The only change for them is to dye there gray.
This happens every…single…time -_-
I work with a Chinese gentleman who is always fascinated with my different hairstyles, but he always asks if he can touch first. Lol!
I always say no u can’t ..simple
I am a white woman with a black daughter (turns 4 next month) and I’m always amazed at how strangers feel like they can just touch her hair anytime. Without asking her or me. Ugh.
One of my former boss did this to me and I wanted to cuss her out and report her.She told me I needed a barrette then she touched my hair without asking and said oh it’s soft.Who the hell does that smh
Can hair be fondled?
Yes honey, I have to read it. I love the title.
I dont know maybe I’m weird but I don’t mind people touching my hair. Just don’t pull it I hate that. I don’t see what the big deal is and why others find it so offensive. I touch people’s hair because I’m a person who needs to feel things. Dirty hands lol really? Come on I’m sure you eat at restaurants and have seen people handle money with gloves on then go back to handling food you don’t scream then when it’s actually harmful to you. Then again were all different women and have different opinions that’s just mine.
I have a look that you wouldn’t even dare. You don’t even wash yo stankin hands please. Try it.
Happens to me whenever I wear a curly hair style.
Nuff times I get my hair done some type of way & people don’t even ask, they just put their hands in…a lady once snuck up behind me @ work & started feeling up my hair…
Get over it. It’s just hair. People touch hair all the time. I’ve had more black women looking at and touching mine than a little bit. If you don’t like it just tell them no they can’t touch it.
The manager at the apartment where I live has been the only person, that has wanted to touch my hair and that is because it is so curly. She is a african american and wanted to feel it for so reason. She said that it was so pretty and curly. I don’t see the reason why somebody wants to feel another person’s hair, but it doesn’t bother me, if they want to cop a feel.
I cannot stand for someone to touch my hair like that. It barely stays in a style as it is, it’s so fine and curly. When someone touches it , invariably it ends up some other way. Catch me when I am off work and ask first, I may indulge you. Otherwise stay back! Hair or not, it is an invasion of personal space, and brings potentially unwashed hands a little too close to the sensitive skin on my face. And let me not start on those who start and can’t seem to stop, like they are petting a kitten to sleep. ugh.